Quotes from Smokey and the Bandit
"Well, thank you, Mr. Bandit. And as the pursuer, may I say you're the goddamnedest pursuee I've ever pursued. Now that the mutual bullshit is over, WHERE ARE YOU, YOU SOMBITCH?" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"Do what I say you pile o' monkey nuts!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"Duck, or you're gonna be talkin' out yo ass!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"Give me a diablo sandwich, a Dr. Pepper, and make it quick, I'm in a goddamn hurry." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"Hey boy, where is Sheriff Branford at? (Sheriff Branford: "I AM Sheriff Branford." Oh, pardon me. For some reason you sounded a little taller on radio." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(Junior: "My hat blew off, Daddy.") "I hope your goddamn head was in it." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(shouting at a trucker that has sheered a door off of Justice's patrol car) "I saw that, you sombitch! You did that on purpose! You're going away till you're gray! I got the evidence!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"If they'd a cremated the sombitch. I could be kickin' that Mr. Bandit's ass around the moon by now." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"If you're gonna hang out in places like this, wear a badge on your didey" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"I'm gonna barbeque yo' ass in molasses!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"My handle is Smokey Bear and I'm tail grabbin' your ass right now!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"Nobody, and I mean NOBODY makes Sheriff Buford T. Justice look like a possum's pecker. (Junior: "Except for that-") Shut your ass." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(Sheriff Branford: "The fact that you are a sheriff is not germane to the situation.") "The goddamn Germans got nothin' to do with it." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(to his son) "There's no way, NO way that you came from MY loins. Soon as I get home, first thing I'm gonna do is punch yo mamma in da mouth!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"This happens every time one of these floozies starts poontangin' around with those show folk fags." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
"What we're dealing with here is a complete lack of respect for the law." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(Alabama State Trooper: "Did you see that? They went right through our roadblock!") "You sombitches couldn't close an umbrella!" - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit
(shouting out of a restaurant to Junior waiting in the car) "You want something? (Junior: "Hushpuppies, Daddy!") We got no time for that crap! [mutters] Dumb sombitch." - Buford T. Justice, Smokey and the Bandit