Read our Review of Old Dogs
(explaining to Dan (Robin Williams) why he can't stay in his apartment with the twins) "This is my crib, man. This is where I get down. This is where I sink the three points. This isn't a place for kids. That pool out there, it's got a 15-foot deep end. Look at this place. I got pointy edged furniture. Look at those spears - they probably still have poison on them. You don't want your kids in this house."
- Charlie,
Old Dogs
(responding to Dan's comment that the sleeping twins were cute) "They are when they're in their dormant configuration."
- Charlie,
Old Dogs
(after Dan tells him that he has to get the twins back) "No, absolutely not. We're going to get them back."
- Charlie,
Old Dogs
(getting psyched up for an athletic contest at camp, Dan smears Charlie's face with bear scat thinking it was mud. Charlie says, "Did you just put poop on my face?") "Yep, scat happens man."
- Dan,
Old Dogs
(Charlie asks Dan how much time do they have left with the twins) "One week, four days, nine hours. God help us."
- Dan,
Old Dogs
(having a tender, bonding moment with his daughter, Emily) "You know that, right, Emily? I will always be there for you. You're my daughter and I will love you forever."
- Dan,
Old Dogs
(having a conversation with Charlie about the future) "I've only made two good decisions in my entire life, marrying Vicki and taking those kids. And those are the two most compulsive things I've done in my entire life besides the tattoo which, God willing, I'll get over one day. I'm feeling another moment of Dan Rayburn compulsivity about to happen."
- Dan,
Old Dogs
(after crashing at the zoo he tells the twins how he really feels) "I not a super hero, kids. Maybe that's a good thing because super heroes are always off fighting crime. I just want to be with you guys, forever, if you'll let me."
- Dan,
Old Dogs