(to the dogs in his van) " OK gang, you know the rules, no humping, no licking, no sniffing hineys." - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"Check out the funbags on that hosehound." - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"I don't get it, Lloyd. She told me ten o'clock, sharp! Are you sure you went to the right bar?...Oh, that pisses me off! That pisses me right off! I hate when women do that. She wanted to see you again! And now no? Now--wait a minute! Wait! She must have meant ten o'clock at night!" - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
(after Lloyd trades the van in for a moped) "Just when I thought you couldn't get any dumber, you go and do something like this...and totally redeem yourself!" - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"Nice set of hooters you got there! (Mary: "I beg your pardon?") The owls! They're beautiful!" - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
(state trooper orders him to pull over) "No, it's a cardigan, but thanks for noticing." - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
(Lloyd suggests they go to Aspen) "Oh, I don't know, Lloyd. The French are assholes." - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"One time, we successfully mated a bulldog with a Shih-Tzu...We called it a bullsh**." - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"Skis, huh? (Beth: "That's right!") Great! They yours? (Beth: "Uh-huh.") Both of 'em? (Beth: "Yes.") Um. Cool!" - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber
"Yeah, I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention" - Harry Dunne, Dumb and Dumber